There is certain something rising up inside of me, as though this thing needs to be heard. It began recently, but my inner senses tell me that it has been itching to break through ever since I began to suspect that my parents were filling me up with a kind of unnatural, in-congruency, that left me confused, angry, frustrated, that was against my intrinsic nature. The realisation that I have resolved, or at least, worked out, all the past behaviour & mistakes that I have made have had their roots in the imposed transferences by my parents. Perhaps going through the challenging stages of Nigredo, I can now relax & take refuge in the knowledge that I have reached the level of Solutio. This is the cleansed stage of ones journey, when one can relax, & take pride in reaching some let up of the darkness of lead in the psyche. The stage where one knows that everything is ok, or soon will be. The place that most people do not make, or have already arrived at, due to their level of Karma.
Carl Jung brought Solutio to modern society, & immersed it in public knowledge. It should be stated here that it was not originally Jung that spoke of Solutio, but Paracelsus, who spoke of it in terms of Alchemy. This he stated was the souls journey through the life of a man. How well he lived his life was how much work he could do retrieve the gold that lies hidden in the soul. The gold of course is the beauty of ones life, & achieving the life we want. The ultimate goal is to return to Godhead, which in accordance to a particular persons belief system, will determine how he sees Godhead. Sometimes it is transformational, as it is in my case. But this still the concept of transformation of the dark matter into the gold of your life. It is a far older process than even Paracelsus, & I believe it goes all the way back to the ancient Arabs of the desert, & the original study of the mysticism of the psyche. The East also spoke of Alchemy in the form of Buddhism, & meditation. This is where, it is said, the concept of Karma actually originated from, but once again one can see that there is still more evidence of Karma in Hindu scriptures, dating back 7000 years. The beauty of this is that it is really unknown where Alchemy originated from, & really does not matter either, because Alchemy, or whatever you choose to call it, is the striving for a better life. Perhaps modern Alchemy could be called Psychoanalysis ? In the 1960s maybe it was LSD. Either way, the point that I making here is not a history lesson on the foundations of Alchemy & mysticism in today`s world, their are many that can do a better job of that than I ever could, but that with the right amount of input, & dedication, one can bring about a change into their lives that is genuine & authentic. A change that will carry them through their life, & make it one of success & satisfaction. The reason that I have chose to dedicate, certainly a large part of my life to self-improvement is because, simply put, I am worth it. I wanted change to take place, so I made it happen.It took courage & time. There was a depression, a serious consideration of suicide, loss of my brother, & then the loss of my mind. So was this Karma, Alchemy, or just stupidity, that allowed me to make such a decision ? It was all of them. A symphony of all three, but above all, it was the desire to will a better life for myself. One that was dignified, authentic, & successful. I went away & did my homework.
Karma, is not the law of cause & effect, which is a set of circumstances that appear in our life as fate, & are put there by ourselves according to the decisions that we make in each moment. There is a thin line distinguishing Karma from self-fulfilling patterns of behaviour. When one goes on about bad progress, or endless negative relationships, addictions & all kinds of horrid situations that keep one held back from progression, the cause of all this is self-sabotage. More associated with low self-esteem & poverty of mind. The ever increasing cycles of self-fulfilling prophecy, & never Karma. Karma is a word that helps us to understand the difference between these cycles of self-flagellation that we put ourselves through, & our destiny. The two, I don`t think are related, but the paradox is that one needs the self sabotage to happen so as to understand ones personal Karma. I shall endeavour to explain, as I see it, according to my own research in personal Alchemy. Perhaps it will assist you ?
The external challenges that I have had to contend with so far have been out of my hands. Now this could be seen to be Karma. Lesser foibles, & bad decision that I have taken have been caused due to my state of mind at that particular time. These decisions have then gone onto to transform my life, one way or another. So this can hardly be called Karma. The process of self-transformation is not Karma, it is exactly that, personal transformation. Karma in this guise would be a kind of personal or spiritual structure that suggests a closer link to our intrinsic nature. Karma is not cause & effect, that is either good, or bad judgement, being exercised in the moment. Karma is deeper, & more entwined with who we really are. Our decision making is subjective, based on how we feel in the moment. It is based upon discretion, & not our spirituality. I am inclined to believe that personal Karma is the theme that runs through our lives from the moment of conception, right up until death, & not just a template of previous actions that have built up during previous incarnations.
As I look back over my life so far, I can see that fundamental life-style choices, decisions, & investments, that I made at the time did end up causing me some serious problems, that have nothing to do with Karma, but my own weakness of mind at the time, for I was also suffering from fear, & a lack of self belief too. A lack of self-belief, it may be said, has stopped me, & many others, from finding the success, unconditional love, & financial security, that one deserves. These are the fundamental things that allow modern man to function at his optimum level. Once man has fulfilled the basic needs within himself he is then able to move up the next stage of is hierarchy of his needs ( to coin Maslow`s saying ). If he is not able to fulfil any of these needs, because of his lack of self-belief then he will suffer frustrations & insecurities, settling for the less. Man cannot function at his best whilst his most basic needs are unmet. There will be a continuous jealousy, resentment, & longing in him, for the things that other men have. It is here that Alchemy, or any process of self-improvement, that he must introduce to release his intrinsic nature, & herald in a freedom that will bring about actualisation of his spirit. If he is serious he will not die about this, & really intends to dedicate his life to self-improvement then of course it will happen. One can dedicate a portion of their time to improving an element of themselves that will bring about the change within a certain situation, but I tend to see this not fully embracing serious change, but just changing the one bit that is not working. This can be perfectly adequate for the moment, but in the end will not be enough to completely transform the soul'.
If we have now looked briefly at what Karma is not, lets take a look at what it is.
When born, one is immediately presented with a set of ideals, parents, a home, & love. The quality of these basic requirements depends largely upon fate. What one gets is exactly what will dictate ones life at the most fundamental stage. The individual will, by & large, be influenced by his parents, or significant others, but underneath all the imposition, however positive, & usually it is not, will reside the individuals intrinsic nature. It is the soul of the indiviual. It is the answer to the all the eternal questions that the individual will at some stage want answered. Such as " What is my lifes purpose ? ". When I think of Karma, I`m reminded of the ancient story of The Golden Fleece, that Jason & The Argonauts carried from Aeetus to Ares. Through this story we can see that fate is be interwoven with Karma. It seems relatively easy to assume that we have lived before, & been given a template to work off by osmosis. The quality of parenting that we receive is the most important of all our relations as we advance along the path. So the position that these people is obviously Karmic. The incredible importance of ones parents influence upon us is profound, as it is this influnce that goes onto direct everything else that we do in our lives. Their morals, ethics, & principles are heavily influenced by them, & can become ingrained. The reasons that we are attached to our particular parents, or not, is down to Karma, or fate.
Coming from a Buddhist background, I have always vehemently believed in Reincarnation, that every one of us has lived before. Souls that are passing through, like time travellers, if you will. The intrinsic nature is what resides in all of us at the deepest level of our personalities. It is the beauty, the Alchemist gold buried deep within the soul, & should be our life`s work getting to the bottom of it. Once we have worked through Nigredo, then the real work can begin, but Nigredo is the most challenging part of the discipline. The Long Night Of The Soul, is what St John Of The Cross called it. This is because many people do not get through it, some do, & it is these that are life`s real heroes. William Blake, said; When Thought Is Closed In Caves Then Love Shall Show It`s Root In Deepest Hell. What he meant was that if one is closed to the process of Self-Improvement then one shall eventually become frustrated, & life will become a perpetual cycle of futility, & if the individual is a highly dominant person, then sometimes this frustration can lead to murder, as a way of releasing inner tensions, due to the wasted life of the person by not being able to channel their energy correctly. Mostly though, in the others section of society that are not ultra dominant, this frustration leads to illnesses. Perhaps this is why cancer is such a big killer today; unrealised dreams & ambitions ?
Sometimes one may notice something different about a person, or want to be near them, whilst out. Or bump into someone, proclaiming a real connection with the individual; this is the intrinsic nature of the person that they want to be near, that they feel attracted too. When one feels a pull to speak to another, or to listen to them, it is the persons intrinsic nature, or Karma, that others are being pulled towards. This is also the case when certain people are actually afraid to go near a person. They can unworthy of being near the man who is attuned to his intrinsic nature writing him off as too good for them. Many fear the beauty of the intrinsic nature, for it can threaten & irritate those that have not done their work. People run from their Karma, they do not want to own it, take responsibility for it, & live a satisfying life. I think that this is sad because Karma plays such a valid & integral part in our lives, that to deny it, run away from it, seems silly.
Interestingly, the intrinsic nature of the evil is still as valid as the positive, as we see with the different levels of murder that happen in our society. It is not always a positive outcome. But it is not worth reflecting too long on this negative side of Karma within the confines of this essay, as I must keep it relatively short.
During the course of this short, & basic essay, on my own theories of Karma, I hope that I have been able to show you Karma, as a concept. It is a phenomenally complex issue, & I do not not think, taken so seriously as it should be. Nevertheless I wanted to offer you a simpler, less stifling understanding of Karma. I hope that I have been able to deliver that.
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